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Every
baby finds an aid of some sort to comfort himself with just before
he goes to sleep. Unless the parents have introduced the aid
themselves, they are usually unaware of just what it is that is
comforting their baby at sleep time. (with the exception of thumb
sucking) An unintroduced comforter could be holding, rubbing or
playing peek-a-boo with the sheets or blankets but sometimes it can
be a little more complicated. I have seen babies play with the bars
in there cots just before falling asleep. That is their comforter
and this can cause a problem when you ask one of these babies to
fall asleep in a travel cot or anywhere away from their beloved cot
bars. If they don't have the bars to play with, they can't fall
asleep. Another common comforter is playing with labels or tags on
bedding or clothing.
The following is a case study
of a baby named Luke. As I seem to be coming
across more and more babies like Luke, I thought
I'd use this article to share his story.
Luke's
parents contacted me when he was 10 months old. Up until this stage,
he had always been a good sleeper. His parents had started Luke on
my routines when he was five weeks old. At 10 weeks, he had started
to sleep all night and had done so nearly every night since. But
now, suddenly, at 10 months he was finding it hard to go to sleep
and once asleep he was waking up crying several times throughout the
night. I consulted with Luke's parents several times over the phone
but we couldn't work out what the problem was so I decided a house
visit was the only option. After putting Luke to bed I decided to
sneak into his room on all fours and observe him in an effort to
work out what the problem was.
At
first, things looked OK. They had put Luke to bed and he was lying
down looking ready for sleep. I watched him and saw a funny movement
in his wrist. He was pulling his fingers up as though he was trying
to scratch his wrist before he became frustrated and started to cry.
It was not the cry you hear when a baby is fighting sleep. He seemed
genuinely upset and had tears so I picked him up and went to talk to
his parents. After a few minutes, we realised he was looking for the
sleeves of his pyjamas but he couldn't find them anywhere as he was
now in short-sleeves for summer. It was now obvious to us all what
Luke's problem had been. We had spent hours on the phone trying to
work out what was different about Luke's environment and I felt very
silly that we had not considered the summer pee-jays to be an issue.
We put Luke back in long sleeves and he started sleeping through the
night again.
This
was a clear case of a baby who was comforting himself to sleep using
an aid that the parents were totally unaware of. It is also a good
example of why it is better for parents to choose their baby's
comforter for them so you know what it is but it can be just about
anything so long as it is safe with him in his cot.
Tips
about baby comforters
There
are a few things you really need to be aware of when introducing a
comforter to your baby;
*
Make sure your baby can still breathe if the comforter gets over his
face (this is why I suggest cotton muslin squares),
*
Make sure your baby can not get it tangled around his neck (About
36cm by 36cm is best)
*
Soft toys are also a good option so long as the fur cannot be pulled
out and accidentally inhaled (pull at the fur a little to see how
easily it comes lose),
*
A downside to soft toys is that they can become a problem if they
are too large or too small. Large toys may be used as an escape
stool when the baby is bigger while small toys can get lost during
the night (There are companies who specialise in comforter toys for
babies and they have usually done a range of research to help work
out what is best for you and your baby, eg. www.snugzeez.com.au),
*
I also recommend that you have a duplicate of your comforter and
that it is machine washable. This means you can rotate and wash them
periodically as well as ensuring you have a back-up in event of loss
or damage.
Tricks
of the trade
There
are also a few tricks to introducing a comforter to your baby. I
believe mum should put it down her top for a few hours to allow her
smell to infiltrate it before putting the comforter in the cot near
baby's face so he can turn and snuggle into it. It is amazing to
watch a baby take solace from their comforter.
It
is my experience that babies with comforters are much happier and
more secure as they progress through certain milestones in their
lives. Research has shown that at about nine months babies often
become very clingy to mum as they realise they are individuals and
not a part of their mothers. A comforter seems to help with this
transition.
Meanwhile,
in Germany there has been some research published recently which
states that slightly older kids feel much more secure if they have a
comforter with them for the first few visits at kinder or day-care.
I also support this notion but feel you should quickly wean your
child off taking it once they are settled. I also firmly recommend
that a comforter is only given to a baby at sleep times or on
occasions when some additional comfort is required such as a visit
to hospital or the doctor. In my opinion, it is not good for
children or babies to be carrying their comforter around all day.
One
other issue I often get called about is when suddenly, at about 10
months, the comforter starts getting thrown out of the cot. The
first time it happens it could be an accident, so walk in without
making eye contact or talking and very calmly return it to the cot.
If this becomes a ritual, the baby is probably game-playing. I
suggest parents in these situations explain to their baby that if
they throw the comforter out it will stay there and they won't have
it to sleep with. If this continues, don't go in straight away but
instead wait until you feel your baby has realised their comforter
might not be coming back. Then walk in without eye contact or
talking and give it back. Each time wait considerably longer and the
game will soon stop.
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